Sunday, October 30, 2005

Adventures in late night television

-- On MSNBC, there is a show on right now in which they are talking about hoarding, as in people who are extreme packrats and save everything. I wasn't really listening, but for awhile, I thought they were talking about "whoring." At hours of the night such as this, I am easily confused. Especially when the "whorer" featured is a 13-year old girl named Megan.

For the sole purpose of making myself look really dumb, here's how one sequence occured between myself and the show...

Me: (Sitting reading an article and not paying attention to the TV.)
TV: Blah...blah...blah...whoring (hoarding)...blah...blah.
Me: (Slowly looks up from the computer) What the?
TV: Whoring (hoarding) can be unsafe for the whore (hoarder) and those around her. Meet Megan, a girl who has been whoring (hoarding) for as long as she can remember.
Me: Oh no. Not one of these shows that's going to make me feel bad.
TV: Like most whores (hoarders), Megan doesn't mean to be messy.
Me: OK, WTF?!? What channel is this? Wait...why are they...what are they...what's going on.
TV: Megan, whose stack of gum wrappers grows every day, has been diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder.
Me: Oh. Yeah. Hoarders. Not whores.

-- The Home Shopping Network never ceases to amaze me. How they actually sell this junk is beyond me. How they sell actually sell this junk to my mom, who used to record the channel, burns a small hole in my brain.

-- Somebody tell Chris Berman to be quiet. His jokes weren't funny in 1995, and they're still not funny in 2005. It's times like these that make me glad I am very close to never watching ESPN (or at least Sportscenter) again.

-- I've never been kidnapped, but this site says it will extreme kidnap you. It sounds interesting. Basically, you can order a kidnapping for yourself, and they come and take you away. I guess it's better than being kidnapped by the mob. You probably don't have to worry about the whole part that includes being killed, having your body dipped in lye and buried in concrete.

-- And then there's Extreme Ironing. Who knew that ironing could be a competitive sport? I like the description...

Welcome to the home of extreme ironing - the latest danger sport that combines the thrills of an extreme outdoor activity with the satisfaction of a well pressed shirt.

It appears to be more of an England/Australia/New Zealand sort of thing. Americans are too stuck up to accept something such as this. Either way, there is some amazing stuff on this site.

-- OK. Yes. A video featuring two Chinese kids lipsynching the Backstreet Boys is funny. However, what really makes me laugh is that the kid in the background on his computer seems totally oblivious to what is going on behind him.

-- I'm going to go extreme sleep.


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