I am a man now.
Tuesday, it's lessons in doing laundry without making a mess, Wednesday, cooking without severely burning myself and the food, and Thursday, how to NOT make the microwave spark and flash by NOT putting metal in it (which is something I've never done, but should probably learn just in case).
Speaking of the microwave, it does spark and flash and make grinding sounds from time to time. I was using it a couple days ago and standing with my back to it when I heard a garblegarblegarble sound and spun around to see these really bright blue flashes. I opened the door and maybe saved the house from burning down. What caused it was someone in this house cooking bacon without covering it. The greese clogged the air vent. Number 1, bacon is gross and it smells. Number 2, I don't want bacon residue resulting in my house burning down.
(Of course, I should note that I was warming up a piece of pizza in a cereal bowl because there weren't any clean plates and I wasn't about to wash one. I have no place to speak.)
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Why didn't anyone alert me when this cereal once existed?